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Italian & English Articles! Personal reflections on life, relationships and energy that shines inside and outside each of us. Enjoy ♥

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Nothing and no one can complete us, but only enrich us.

None of us is a perfect human being, but we are perfect in our completeness.

In which sense?

In the sense that everyone has got the necessary tools to achieve his/her completeness.

Then… why do we always feel somehow incomplete? Why do we rush so much searching things and people that can complete us? What do we really miss?

Actually we don’t miss anything, but the problem lies in the fact that we always feel that we miss something.

For example, if our stomach gives us a nod of emptiness, we run immediately in search of food and then we eat and keep eating as if there wasn’t any tomorrow. We don’t even give too much importance to what we are eating, because what matters is that we fill our sense of emptiness! Sometimes we are not even hungry, but it’s just our feeling of incompleteness that let us feel hungry and let us believe that we can fix that gap with food ….YUM, YUM, YUM!

Also, when we feel alone and incomplete, we always run to do shopping, but we don’t understand that it is only our wardrobe that gets filled while our soul empties more and more …BUY, BUY! It’s nice occasionally to buy something as a gift for ourselves…but what usually happens is that we sell our soul to those objects by transforming ourselves into objects as well.

The same thing often happens with our heart. If it gives us the slightest feeling of suffering or loneliness, here we are running immediately in search of affection, love, friends, lovers…and if it doesn’t work, we dive into alcohol, drugs…..SPLASH! Is it really our heart to speak to us, to lie to us?

If we perceive a light feeling of deep silence, we rush to call a friend on the phone, to switch on the TV or listening to music. We always need to communicate or listen to someone or something to talk with, to be listened by….BLA, BLA, BLA!

Do we really need to fill us in this way or rush so desperately in search of something or someone to fulfill us as soon as possible? And, most important, do we really feel satisfied after? Did we really solved this lack? We probably believe we did it for the first few seconds, minutes or days…but then what?

Then we find ourselves panting again and looking for something else…and so on forever. We suffer, we run, we try, we find, we rejoice, we lose, we cry….we suffer again, run again, try again..and so on.

The problem is that as long as we continue to look outside for the solution to this feeling of lack, we will end only to find ephemeral and illusory solutions.

Where is that instead we do have really have to look?

Within yourself. This is the only answer. It is not easy at all. It’s not easy because the outside always seems so beautiful and bright, while the inside is dark and things do not appear clearly, then, it’s frightening. It is not easy to sit with yourself, in front of yourself and “talk”. And the only way to really talk to you is to be silent. There are answers that only silence can give and, as darkness, silence scares. Yes, it scares because it could be suddenly interrupted by something unexpected. Yes, it scares because it leaves us naked in front of the mirror of our soul. Being naked scares. Being naked, in silence, in the darkness of ourselves, scares. Not everyone has the courage to do it, and many of those who embrace the challenge, midway take a step back frightened and find themselves back to square one. It is not easy, but after every climb there is always a descent.

Today’s society has grown in the philosophy of NEED. We grew up as incomplete beings that always NEED something or someone to be complete, happy and completely happy. Everything is now advertised and sold to satisfy our needs…

“SELLING EMOTIONS” was the headline of a newspaper article that I read about ten years ago…

Everything and every person has a particular and special role in our life, but everything and every person has to be seen as a means of enrichment and expansion and not erroneously as a means of completion…as a need! There is nothing outside of ourselves that can complete us; however there is an immense variety of experiences and people who can enrich us.

It’s hard to accept it. It’s difficult to be “self-sufficient”. It’s hard to really love yourself without feeling the need of external confirmations, without giving too much importance to others’ opinions, without having always a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold onto. Nowadays you can just look out the window, watch the TV or walk in a shopping center to find yourself inundated with “pre-packaged solutions” full of additives that “suicide” your soul.

We don’t need it!

If we meet on our journey, people who give us love and serenity, we must be happy and thankful for that… but we must also see it as a very nice meeting, as a fabulous time of sharing…and nothing more! We meet people but do not belong to each other, never. Nothing and no one can complete us, but only enrich us. Nobody can fill our sense of emptiness, because this would be like seeing the other as a physical object to get stuck into yourself, like a puzzle piece missing, and leave it there forever…impossible!!! Not even the real objects can complete us…how can they complete us anyway? They are OBJECTS!

In this path within yourself you must remember one thing:

In order to achieve your inner peace it’s not enough to find refuge on your own peaceful island. Knowing how to be alone with yourself is an unmistakable quality but it must not be confused with the only way of resolution. Who has really reached a state of balance with him/herself is the one who has managed to find a balance with him/herself, with the surrounding reality and, above all, with him/herself in this reality. Reality that includes a host of things, situations and people…many of which often create unease to us. Inconveniences that willingly are our best teachers of life, because they put us to the test and turn on in us the alarm and the desire of resolution.

Annunci

FACEBOOK SERIOUSLY AFFECTS YOUR HEALTH

Premise: The content of this article, like all the others, is RELATIVE. I would urge all of you to not feel pulled in due for any reason in particular. But it’s welcome, as always, who wants to discuss different points of view, arguments and other considerations regarding the article. Have a good reading (:

I felt that this moment would come and I’m sure that many others before me, have dealt with the same subject, and perhaps even in the same terms…but I feel I must give voice to my thoughts about it.

It’s finally my moment to talk about FACEBOOK.

I think all of us know quite well how this social network works and I won’t certainly be here to rehash on its modes of operation. I will however point out, in particular, the effects that these modes create. Effects found by me on myself but that, in my opinion, often involve many of the users of Facebook. The points to be addressed are many and I honestly don’t know where to start (I won’t even treat all of them), but I think it’s right to start from the feeling that led me to write this article:

SADNESS.

I have been realizing for years, but few days ago more than ever, how Facebook has got the power to produce negative effects on me, on my psyche and on my personality. Among the other things, however, the one that made ​​me saddest was my pathetic counting the number of “Likes” that I could collect for each status, photo, link…or whatever! And, above all, from time to time, I was paying attention to WHO had clicked that damn button (Y)! COUNTING THE “LIKES” ????? Then I said to myself: how have you reduced yourself, Martina? Realizing that a “Like” could have so much value to me, it made me sooooo SAD!

And not only that.

I often found myself devoting so much time flipping through photo albums of COMPLETE STRANGERS or people of whom I DIDN”T CARE AT ALL, analyzing the virtual life of people with whom I wouldn’t even have said “hello”, or people to whom I would have said “hello” (a real one) but of whose lives (especially the virtual ones) didn’t interested me at all. And all this for what? Maybe just to see how those people, on Facebook, were dressed, if they were happy or sad, or to see how much they were ridiculous… Until I realized that I was the most RIDICULOUS one, doing what I was doing!!!

I was losing then, inexplicably, the conception of time and hours passed by simply counting “Likes”, flipping randomly through photos of random people, with no particular motivations, or commenting on links and status for which I haven’t really had interest and then, maybe, finding myself bogged in virtual and futile conversations, debates and quarrels to which, in real life, I would have NEVER taken part or, in real life, I would have tackled in a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT way. And here I take this opportunity to emphasize my bad relationship with debates on FB: during debates face to face, the person in front of you cannot escape, drink a coffee or go to the toilet before to answer you, he/she cannot search for clever answers on Google to reply to you, he/she cannot wait for you to lose your patience before giving you an answer, nor he/she can avoid to do that (even if he/she did, you would read, however, a response through his/her attitude). I love watching my interlocutor’s reactions and paying attention to his/her looks, uncertainties, firmness, rhetorical skills, his/her insight, stability, instability, coldness, warmth, wisdom, his/her superficiality, restlessness, calm…and so on! I love don’t miss anything of my interlocutor! Instead, I found myself there on Facebook commenting random links and status and often waiting entire days for an answer, whose waiting was ruining me inside…and in the while, I was thinking of the thousands likely reactions, of my virtual interlocutor, to my opinions.

And not only that.

In the case of public debates, i.e. through public comments, it was strong even the thought about what people (ANYONE) could think about my comments (how many “Likes” will earn my snappy sentence??? Will I look pretty smart to the eyes of intelligent people???)…people who had nothing to do with the conversation, but that could take part of it in ANY WAY & ANYTIME, with or against me. That meant only one thing: ANXIETY! This has engendered in me just a lot of fucking anxiety, apprehension, worry, restless curiosity, impatience and so on…with attached OBSESSIVE CONTROL, minute by minute, of any updates!!

Another fundamental point, which made my FB (& real) life infinitely sad, was the fact of “suffering” because of the publication of happy posts by strangers or people that I didn’t really like. A sort of envy mixed with latent selfishness & with annexes thoughts of ill omen. Why is that ????? I was doing that even if…I was happily (or perhaps only apparently?) satisfied with myself and my life. Unfortunately this is one of the most evil psychology of Facebook: whether you like it or not, the protagonist of a happy photo or a positive status of which you are witness, will always seem happier than you, in that moment, when you looked at it. Maybe that person is the saddest person in the world (and maybe you know it), maybe that picture is at the only party to which that person has been in the last 6 months (and maybe you know it), or maybe the same person has staged that fake smile with 42 teeth to deceive the people of Facebook, and maybe even his/herself, of his/her happiness (and maybe you know even this)…but it doesn’t matter because, in a corner of your subconscious, you’ll always think: “Look how he/she’s having fun, lucky him/her!” or related & similar thoughts…BECAUSE, IF IN THAT PARTICULAR MOMENT, YOU’RE THERE CHECKING WHAT PEOPLE DO ON FACEBOOK, IT MEANS THAT “YOU’RE NOT REALLY HAVING FUN”! If you were truly happy with yourself, doing things you love to do, alone or with people you really love, YOU WOULD IGNORE FACEBOOK! When your real life is full of joy and of joyful people, the thought of seeing on FB what people do, it doesn’t even tickle you.

Your incomplete life leads you to seek refuge in Facebook…but Facebook, in turn, makes your life incomplete..because it keeps you bound to a virtuality that won’t ever allow you to reach your completeness!

It’s like a fucking dog that he is trying to bite its tail! It was indeed tested that Facebook makes people SAD because the emotions of its users are often influenced by what they read…and the most positive post makes readers negatives.

My feeling of sadness was even deeper because of my uncontrollable need to share my goals & personal (dis)satisfactions with FB world: PEOPLE, I DID IT! PEOPLE, I UNDERSTOOD ALL ABOUT LIFE! PEOPLE, I’M DIFFERENT AND I’M PROUD OF IT! PEOPLE, I’VE GOT A JOB! PEOPLE, I’LL NEVER GET MARRIED or PEOPLE I’M SAD & MISUNDERSTOOD! PEOPLE, I SUFFER AND I’M SICK OF EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE! PEOPLE, MY COUNTRY SUCKS!
PEOPLE, I’M NOT SATISFIED ABOUT MY LIFE AND I WRITE SAD STATUS LOOKING FOR AN HELP FROM ALL OF YOU, EVEN IF I DON’T KNOW YOU, EVEN IF I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOU, EVEN LESS, ABOUT ME! And so on.. I couldn’t keep my happiness to me, or at least, to share it, in a friendly and private way, just with the dearest people..I COULD NOT! I absolutely wanted to see HOW MANY “LIKES” MY HAPPINESS COULD COLLECT!

I had, as I usually do, many programs in mind for my days: reading books, writing or translating articles, doing researches, playing, drawing, running…but 70% of my projects almost always failed for LOOKING AT FACEBOOK FOR HOURS WITHOUT ANY REASON! Moreover, in addition to my mental health, I was damaging also my physical posture, my sight etc..

The thought of deleting my FB account has appeared several times in my head, and I’ve also tried to do it in the past…but with very little results. Because, whether I want it or not, this social network is useful to me for various reasons (blog, friends abroad, news, job, etc.). I’ve had for long time the idea of creating a profile where I say a little or nothing about myself (that’s what the real life is for!) and, instead, to use for practical, useful and immediate purposes (that’s what the virtual life is for!)…that’s why I created a profile to be used only and exclusively for my blog, a profile that, however, always keeps alive the possibility to keep in touch with close friends, relatives and so on.

And here I take this opportunity to talk about another FB aspect that I would like to share with you, and that is the COLLECTION OF FRIENDS, like figurines of an album of players (thankfully with no duplications). I just say…if in the real life we don’t speak or we speak reluctantly, why should you be in my virtual life?? I state that I don’t deny anyone the opportunity to know me virtually (although even this new approach of meeting makes me very sad), but if after several attempts, it doesn’t arise any kind of connection between you and me, why should you be offended to not belong anymore to my list of virtual friends?

I take this opportunity also to unveil the second reason that led me write this article.

It was also written for all those who, in one way or another, felt or will feel offended by me to have removed them from Facebook. And to all of them I say: “The fact that I have deleted you from Facebook doesn’t assume that I hate you or that I don’t esteem you or that I want to tease you! I just don’t find necessary my VIRTUAL relationship with you, but it doesn’t mean that any real relationship is excluded (as well as, I repeat, it doesn’t mean that you cannot contact me anyway). The fact that you are not among my FB friends doesn’t presuppose that I wouldn’t say hello to you if I met you on the street or that I wouldn’t willingly exchange a few words with you if I met you in the pub while I drink a beer. On the contrary!!! (If I was you, I would be offended if someone added you on FB and then he/she wouldn’t say even hello to you when you meet her/him on the street – which happens in 70% of cases, because VIRTUALITY IS EASY). Damn, don’t you think that we can be friends in real life without being friends on Facebook ?? (Damn…. people have survived without FB before!!). Also, if you, like me, do not find a real interest to relate with me, for which reason you should feel offended?!?!?! On the contrary, you should thank me for having had the sincere courage to have cut a sterile relationship like ours! If you feel offended by the fact that I have deleted you from my FB friends, despite your estimate/interest/level of friendship towards me is equal to 0.3 %, then I assume it’s just because this hurts your frivolous pride, or because you worry about the fact that what happened will make less populated your home/wall..or, perhaps, because you risk to lose a position among WHO HAS GOT MORE FRIENDS.. Mmm no, maybe it’s simply because you cannot longer know my “private” life/business or, even worse, because you cannot show me how much you are HAPPY & SATISFIED ABOUT YOUR LIFE! In that case, I’m sorry to tell you that I DON’T GIVE A DAMN! ”

Honestly, I respect me too much to see myself as a victim of these stupid psychological games that the little evil man behind FB plans, second by second, to make all of us miserable and drugged virtual automatons, like puppets in the hands of a sad “virtual reality”. Don’t tell me that you have never felt, at least once, to be victims of all of this crap, or that you don’t think that all of this (you feel part of it or not) is terribly SAD!?!?!

FACEBOOK SERIOUSLY AFFECTS YOUR HEALTH!

images_dipendenza_da_facebookscrivania2

Don’t get addicted!

What is BALANCE?

What is balance?
Is it a stable and static condition or a permanently unstable condition? Maybe a precariously stable one?
What is stability?
Is it a static equilibrium or a dynamically stable equilibrium?
Can stability be dynamic?
Yes, it could not be otherwise.
Staticity does not exist.

Even a statue corrodes over time. Nothing escapes to the dynamics. Not even the balance. Panta rhei. Also, balance is not synonymous with immobility. In my opinion, balance is a serene and peaceful condition. I would see it as a synonym for awareness. It does not matter if we change or if we fail nor if we are sad or if we feel vulnerable…what is important it is to be aware of what happens to us and around us. Our life can be dynamically unstable, as regards events or states of mind, but consciously stable at the same time. Increased awareness brings greater balance, therefore a lesser chaos. And chaos comes from unawareness. Every emotion, every event, every tear, every smile, every mistake, every satisfaction, every action can become a master of life. Thanks to our awereness we become our own master. Are you sad? Ask yourself why. Are you happy? Ask yourself why. Are you dissatisfied? Ask yourself why. Are you negative? Ask yourself why. Don’t you know why? Ask yourself why. Give a reason to everything that happens to you. Do not waste your tears. Drink them, analyze them, praise them. Look into yourself, speak with yourself. Do not complain about your sadness and do not take your happiness for granted. Each inner dialogue is synonymous with growth, awareness and balance.

We often believe that we have lost our balance but it is simply because we have stopped asking to ourselves “why”. When we lose the sight of ourselves and we begin to move by inertia, routinely, and we begin to take certain things for granted.. it is that the exact time when we fall down onto the ground. Do not take your own balance for granted and do not believe that it is completely achieved. Balance has to be lived day by day but it disappears as soon as we think we do not need to make any more effort to get it. Balance disappears when we stop to look inside ourselves. The presumption of having reached it leads to his own annihilation. Of course you can be aware of your balance but just keep wondering why. Do we feel in balance? Let’s ask ourselves why. Are we aware of that? Let’s ask ourselves why. Do we feel to have lost our balance? Let’s ask ourselves why. Let’s talk with ourselves. Let’s talk. Let’s ask why, to ourselves and to others. When you understand why certain things happen, why certain things happen to us, we give to each event the value that it deserves. By doing so we stop wasting energy in events that do not deserve it at all and we start to appreciate what really deserves our attention and all our “whys”. Ask yourself why, throughout .. Some “whys” will start to come by themselves and others, however, will stop automatically to show up. By asking questions and speaking to yourself, you will understand yourself and, by understanding yourself, you will reach your balance. But it will be the balance of that specific time of your life. Life is an eternal changing, so even the way in which your balance is manifested can change.

What’s a problem and where does it come from?

What’s a problem and where does it come from?

In order to find an answer to this question, I would start from a very common sentence: “Life is difficult.”

Assuming this statement to be true. I don’t see anything negative in the difficulties, as I don’t see anything negative into a problem. For the theory of opposites according to which nothing has reason to exist without its opposite, solutions wouldn’t exist without problems or simplicity wouldn’t exist without difficulty. In order to appreciate the difficulties in front of which life submit us, together with all the problems that overcrowd it, the first thing we need to understand it’s the true magnitude of any problem and the real cause from which they originate. True understanding of a problem leads to its own resolution, attached with a nice package of teachings that are fundamental to our growth.I emphasize the word “real” beacuse, to the eyes of many, the problem’s entity, as well as its origin, is characterized by a false understanding, i.e. often projected on something or someone outside of ourselves. Not only that, even the solution is identified outside (drugs, medicines, psychologists, etc.). Moreover, it seems almost logical that “external problem = external solution.” Ephemeral solution that takes care of only the symptoms of a problem whose cause is elsewhere. It’s mainly on this aspect that I would like to invite you to think about: every problem has its origin in ourselves and only in ourselves we can find the solution. You could let me note that many problems, together with their related difficulties that life holds for us, often rain down on us without our consent…such as for example a serious illness or a natural disaster (although even in this case I think we should consider ourselves somewhat responsible). But the problem is not what happens, it’s our fault or not, but how we react to what happens to us. We are the drivers of the wagon with which we walk our lives and even though we cannot foresee all the difficulties that life holds for us, we can always find the best way to address them. If we don’t succeed, then the problem arises. It arises from ourselves, and in ourselves we must look for its solution:

why did I create this problem?

This is the question we should always ask ourselves. And the answer has to be found not outside but within us, shedding light on the darkest side of our soul and our spirituality… because many problems lie dormant in the depths of our unconscious and often we live our lives totally ignoring their existence. I have never said say that this introspection is easy. If it had been easy we wouldn’t have ever even created any problem. After all, “Life is difficult.” But when we realize that what we really seek is hidden within us, everything becomes simple and beautiful. Yes, beautiful. How bad could ever be something that can only make us feeling better? Digging deep into ourselves, to reach the place where resides the source of our problems, can only make us feeling better…because it’s in the place where you’ll find the cause that you’ll magically find the solution also.

The real problem is not understanding the problem.

Together with those people who look for solutions outside, there is another variety of people, and that sees the solution to every problem in the removal of the problem itself. Obviously even this it’s an ephemeral and illusory solution. In which sense? This category of people recognizes the problem and in part it also understands it, but it’s not strong enough to deal with it and, therefore, it avoids it. A few examples: there are those who avoid people who hurt them or avoid foods that make them fat, so they don’t get sad or fat…but when they are, not by their own choice, in front of those people that make them sad or foods that make them fat, they inevitably suffer and eat everything without any control. Why is it like that? Because they have simply dismissed the problem, without solving it.

So, look for the source of any problem within yourself, and when you find it don’t get scared but face it! When you decide to face your difficulties, you will begin to appreciate every problem because you will begin to be aware of the fact that all the “problems” that you unknowingly create, have a particular role…the role to let you make many small steps forward in your journey of personal growth.

And it is an infinite path 🙂

 

 

20 strangers kissing for the first time

Whether it’s true that these people were strangers or not I don’t care. I love this video. At least…why not? Why should not we kiss a stranger? Because he/she could be a murderess? Because he/she might have diseases? Because we don’t know where he/she was born, how old is he/she, if he/she uses drugs, if he/she has a boyfriend/girlfriend, if he/she is a criminal or what? How many times has happened to meet someone and to set an appointment with him/her? And how many times did you go to that appointment and did you kiss that person? Don’t you believe that at the second, third or fourth date that person is still a stranger? You can discover aspects of dear friends after years. Your partner may appear as a completely different person after years of marriage. You can love a person for a lifetime and one day seeing him/her unexpectedly as a stranger. Do not recognize someone anymore because he/she did or said something that you would never expected. Who is a stranger at least? Life is not enough to know ourselves, so how can you believe to know perfectly someone else? Where is the feeling in kissing a stranger you say? And if the feeling was in the kiss itself? And if the feeling was linked to the anonymity and to the fact that we can love someone even for a single moment in a totally disinterested way? An unpretentious kiss without any expectations. Maybe we should kiss always in this way the people we love. So..why not? We could be one big family. Some of you now could reduce my thoughts to a big pornographic orgy. No. But why not an orgy of feelings? Orgies of emotions and sharings. Hugs and kisses. Smiles and caresses.

A kiss,
Martina

We are our own masters

When we think of wanting to do something we should not do, the “damage” is already done, right? Might as well do that thing, right? Otherwise our actions would be hypocritical, right?

It’s a concept that can be extended to any type of relationship…sentimental, friendship or familiar. A practical act is a result of a thought (usually)…for example if a betrayal happens it’s because first we thought we would do it and if we decided to do it, we have already betrayed. Right?

The key point of the argument is: the betrayal..where is it? If we did or just thought something that it meets our needs and our essence…why the relationship with others should change? In fact, I would see the treachery against ourselves when we force ourselves to suppress what we feel sincerely to do.

Honesty hurts .. but I don’t think it makes sense to repress ourselves.. and we should instead follow the flow of our essence and let it carry us.. If what we do is what we perceive as more in tune with ourselves at that moment, why it should be “wrong”? Of course I’m talking about lifestyle choices that are not going to severely damage people that are involved… but, when we find our balance, repressing ourselves would mean altering this balance and pretending with ourselves and with others! I don’t know…maybe I have in my mind an utopian vision of universal love and sincerity difficult to understand and accept…

And it’s not about to listen to the head, to the heart or to the stomach. I believe the head, heart, stomach, liver, feet, pinky etc. work together because if the stimulus is not generated by everything that is part of us, physical or abstract it is, then it’s not what we want really to do. Mind and body are acting in sync..

For learning about ourselves and the stimuli that our body gives and receives, we can and we often have to “use” others. We are all available to everyone. And we mustn’t be afraid to do so for fear of hurting someone.. I would assume that no one can hurt us if we don’t want it and blaming others is cowardly and for insecure people.. We are responsible for ourselves and our sufferings, as well as our happiness.. All the people we meet are “tools” in the evolution of our lives and our personal growth…and each of us is a tool for the others, who are friends, lovers or simply passers.  This thought should not offend anyone because it’s a thought that includes all of us..indeed it should make us rejoice that a world of people, relationships, experiences and sensations awaits us everyday_wherever we go_whatever we do. If our way of doing or thinking hurts someone who relates to us it’s because there is something unresolved in the person to whom we are relating.. This thought does not justify our actions, not at all…ourselves in our life we meet someone whose words or actions could cause us suffering and not being able to avoid it, but we can work on ourselves and on our ability to make us impervious to negativity. Obviously we can choose to mold us and act in a calm and gentle way in order to avoid any kind of suffering to others but ,at least in my opinion, it does not depend entirely on us… No coincidence it often happens that we act with good faith and we create suffering.. why? Regardless of who is or is not the culprit (this is a separate chapter), our suffering is avoidable or at least manageable…by ourselves. Blaming the generator of suffering certainly does not help us. This doesn’t mean ignoring our actions…we cannot do it, but we can ignore those of others… And for ignoring I don’t mean underestimate or not caring about them, but being aware of their insignificance and negativity.. We should not generate negativity but above all, do not let the negativity of others to creep into us..
Often generating suffering creates suffering in ourselves and this often occurs regardless of the importance that the “victim” has for us, as when we make good actions and we feel rewarded regardless of who is the person who receives our good. Between all of us reigns a subtle and profound empathy and it’s difficult to cultivate positive empathy by removing the negative one.

At the base we don’t endure that the men need pain to learn, to learn about life (like when you fall and you hurt yourself, or you hit a wall and just at that moment you realize that you have to avoid that thing). But the pain is curable when we have the right knowledge that makes it less suffering.. We all have a sadistic side (without which our goodness wouldn’t have raison d’etre)… and there are those who can keep it at bay, there is those who fear it, there are those who pretend to not have it, but there are those who worship it.. By the way:

it’s not what we live that creates in us joy or pain, but everything resides in how we live.. And to quote a friend of mine from Senegal “doesn’t count what you see with your eyes, but what your eyes look.”

Life is art

Everything means something.. It’s not easy but it’s nice to try to interpret something about someone that we don’t know, because often there are connections between ourselves and the person that we don’t know, even if we are not aware yet of it.. We are all connected and there’s always something to discover inside each of us. The idea to leave  always a space within ourselves for someone who still we don’t know, that we are knowing now or that soon we will know….it’s lifeblood. It comes by itself the time when you are ready to embrace the things in a certain way even though it is considered a mistake to lose sight of this kind of “hug”, but consciousness doesn’t go very far without awareness.. in the sense that you cannot understand what is best for yourself without being aware of the way down of it, you have to put into practice your consciousness.. and live your own inner light fully. The awareness grows up in small drops, and when you think you are dehydrated, you’re still listening, you’re always fertile ground. Unfortunately and fortunately everything is in our hands, we are masters of ourselves and of our happiness even in dealing with situations that don’t depend on us. Happiness is waiting to be embraced, don’t blame yourself, the “guilts” happen for a reason…analyze them instead to remove them..

The awareness comes in small drops, and when you think you are dehydrated, you’re still listening, you’re always fertile ground. Unfortunately and fortunately everything is in our hands, we are masters of ourselves and of our happiness even in dealing with situations that do not depend on us. Happiness is waiting to be embraced, don’t blame yourself, the “guilts” happen for a reason .. analyze them instead to remove them..

Why a person should find difficult to talk about him/herself in front of another person whose intentions are wholly good? First, you should establish a good dialogue with yourself before that with others, without it you will never have clear and spontaneous relationships and, often, you will believe only to experience them.. It happens many times to delude ourselves and if it happens it’s just because there is something unresolved at the base with ourselves and the solution shouldn’t be found anywhere else except inside of us, although it would seem much easier to trace it into the others. There is a solution that you cannot see, not with the eyes.. Don’t focus on how you did one thing, but what prompted you to do it… If the reasons were clean, transparent and genuine, then that thing, in any way it came out, it’s pretty special, “perfect”…

Life is art. You cannot judge it, you can just live it. We shouldn’t classify it but taste it! Everything you create is beautiful, and not because it’s beautiful to look within certain canons, but because it was born in a fantasy world of your own inner soul.. Art has a vital function, think about whole life as art, about emotions as art, about love as art.. Creativity makes you free to be yourself and to communicate without any obligation imposed from outside. Think about it often, whatever you do, put this thought into everything you do.. When you undertake a certain perspective of life, when you focus your energies in a given way, well…so many beautiful things happen to you and it is not fate or coincidence…we could call it Karma or not call it at all, but one thing is certain: positivity attracts positivity! It’s not a coincidence that certain things happen as it’s not a coincidence that you meet “unknown” people that make you partaker of their lives without knowing who you are. They don’t know anything about you but your energy comes and brings those people around you to share with you what they experience, although apparently they have no reason to do so. Positivity is not necessarily synonymous with optimism, it’s love for love and it’s like transforming everything creatively into something positive for yourself, for others, for everyone.. Everything is included in love.. We would live better if we stop to be afraid, to be afraid of losing the people with whom we have never been really connected, afraid of being alone, afraid of being judged, afraid of not appearing as we would like…a bunch of bullshit!

Often removing the negativity of some people apparently dear to us is needed to clean outside and inside of us, to delete all the shit! Listen to your heart and start doing things that you really love to do, even if this may lead to changes in you that not everyone can understand.. Even if your change is reproached by your friends, despite you’re being happy of it, go on your way because these are people who don’t really care about you and your essence, and just because you don’t behave exactly as they expect from you, when in fact you have gained your identity, they hinder you.. The moment in which you start to be yourself, to listen to your heart and to be spontaneous and sincere with what you feel, some people will automatically turn away from you and others will approach automatically to you, and if you’re happy with yourself, then you will also be sure that the people who will approach to you will only be beautiful and special people. Someone will see you like a muse, a help for their lives, while others will want to share with you their heart and soul.. People are not always ready to accept the changes of others, often because they are unable victims to do the same, or rather they are not yet ready for appending essential changes in their lives and so they try to devalue the path of others..

If you understand what is best for you, you have the tools to help others to find themselves.. Art is nothing if there is no sharing.. Surely you will suffer in your life sometimes but it’s the perspective with which you will face everything that will make your life beautiful as it is. Do what you feel and if you feel something, do it as soon as possible, don’t put off and don’t let anyone to hinder you. Who loves you shouldn’t hinder you and who doesn’t love you deserves to be dismissed.. And the love that binds you to other people is not necessarily a love that stems from a knowledge gained of the other before.. There are those who love you even if they don’t know you, but they love you for the energy you transmit and they make rooting for you.

Make rooting for yourself.

Life is art. Art is sharing. Share your life.

Your energy is worth more than a thousand words

Know yourself and you will know the world. Yes, the world. People, animals, plants. Vibrations, sensations and energies. We spend our lives searching ourselves outside, in the others, in the work, in the expectations. We spend our lives looking for a soul mate or a best friend, without knowing ourselves. The soul mate doesn’t exist if we don’t know our soul. And the “friend of the heart” doesn’t exist if we do not know our heart. Know yourself and others will know you. Love yourself and others will love you . Appreciate yourself and others will appreciate you. Not all of course.. It’s just you, that with the energy you emanate, select the people that are around you, that really know you, that love you or appreciate you. Don’t complain if people that surround you don’t like you, don’t love you or don’t appreciate you as you would like, and don’t blame something or someone else about your dissatisfaction. Because if it happens it’s just because YOU don’t know who you are and what you want. The life that you say being difficult, the world that you say being unfair and the city that you say being small, sad and limited, are full of special people. Yes, those special people that you have been looking for a long time and you have been crying to not have found them. The world is full of those people and you, in the meantime…what do you do? You spend your time complaining that you have not found them without realizing that they pass in front of your tears. Find yourself and they will come to you as a result. If you’ll be running after them losing yourself, you’ll be breathless and alone. And you wont understand where you went wrong because you will waste all of your energy to be angry to have run so much to get what you wanted without any results. Stop for a moment, don’t run without any reason, it’s a waste of energy that you can direct to other resources. Don’t you realize that you are running standing on the spot? Stop for a moment. Give voice to your body, to your mind, to your heart .. and shut your damn mouth. Stop complaining or making excuses. You are not the chosen one of the losers. You didn’t receive the incurable disability of the unhappiness. There is no disease worse than the one we create by ourselves. Your body is vibrating energy that you underestimate. You trust the fate. You call “luck” the positivity and “bad luck” the negativity. You confuse a clue with the case and an effect with a coincidence. Destiny? Luck? Bad luck? Case? Coincidence? Crap. No doubt the environment in which we live (family, friends, school, work, society) is not negligible. But rather than seeing this environment as something that affects us in a negative way, I would see it rather as something that puts us to the test. A stimulus for the emission of our energy. If our energy is negative, inevitably we sow negativity around us. The contrary if it’s positive. Energy is not something that comes out voluntarily or talking for hours, but it is emanated and perceived without any control. It happens. Occurs. And feeling its flow is magical. A new baptism into a mechanical and apathetic reality. Energy doesn’t need words, and I’ve already “talked” too much. See you at your baptism, bye bye.

Smile

Spontaneous
Moment of
Incredible
Laugh of
Energy

PosSexsion

We always talk about love as possession without thinking that the possessiveness often reigns also in friendships.
We are taught from an early age that we have to have the best friend…. OUR best friend.
When I was a child I had to “book” my best friend, otherwise I risked that someone could precede me and forced me to choose another one.
The best friend has privileges that other friends do not have, but also the best friend expects something that other friends do not expect.
The best friends, as the lovers, expect the sms of goodnight/good morning, or the “I miss you/ I love you” weekly … and also a monthly average of 4 hearts on their Facebook wall!
No coincidence that I decided to not officialize no longer any relationship!
Why do you need to sign a contract in every kind of relationship?
Can you live without giving a name to all the things you do and all the relationships that you live?
Can you just live?

I don’t need to know your name or what you do in your life to love you.
I don’t need to know how many times you think about me per day or how often you contact me to believe you’re a good friend.
I don’t need to have met you long time ago to love you and I don’t need to see you every fucking day to think we are close friends!
And I do not need to receive constant attentions from you to be happy about our friendship.
But above all, I don’t need to obsessively repeating my feelings for you …
I don’t speak just for moving the air, that’s why if I said to you “I love you” 3 months ago..it’s still valid, dammit, even without its obsessive repetition!
And less you will expect such stupid confirmations from me, most I’ll give to you!

Don’t be offended if tomorrow I will love a stranger as much as I love you.
Don’t be offended if I’ll spend the Saturday evening with him/her or if I’ll decide to not go out at all.
<<< IF GOD EXISTS, HE SHOULD DAMN THE FEVER OF SATURDAY NIGHT & BLESS THE MONDAY! >>>
And don’t be offended if you don’t keep up to date on my life 24 hours 24.
Maybe I cannot or maybe I don’t want … in any case, whatever has happened, happens or will happen.. it has been, it is and it will be always SPONTANEOUS!
Be happy for everything I do or I don’t do because it’s natural, pure, free!
What else do you want?
Fiction?
Repression?
Possession?

What could be more beautiful than the spontaneity?
I think nothing.
I think that anything that is not natural can be really nice.
A friend of mine once said: “Please contact me only when you truly want to do it and never because you fear that if you don’t do it it can have a negative impact on our relationship..”
Trust that everything that is not spontaneous does not lead to anything good and it is destined to end, or be fake and suffered.

As soon as we are afraid of losing those around us, we have already lost ourselves.
We see ourselves as incomplete people, with empty compartments that things and people absolutely have to fill, but it’s not like that..
There is nothing to fill, there is just so much to expand, infinitesimally ..
Each person can enrich us, everyone is basic but no one is indispensable!
There’s no need to cling forever to one or more people in particular.
We are all passengers!
You should be happy for every friend you known, regardless of whether this friendship is to last days, months or years!
Some friends share with you just one day of their life, but it is a day that lasts forever!

What is possession?
Not even we belong completely to ourselves!
We are abstract matter and concrete energy.

In
possexsion
I see
only
sex.

I would like people to…

I would like people to hug each other more and look deep into their eyes .
I would like people to speak with their eyes and smile with their heart.
I would like people to live every fucking emotion and do not hide themselves behind their fears…but instead, seduce them.
I would like people to make love with their own fears and stop being afraid of themselves, of their own bodies and their own desires.
I would like people to be less jealous and understand that the naturalness of a feeling can not be repressed, inhibited or forced.
I would like people to undress more and stop to see the body as an enemy or as a tool.
I would like people to cuddle their body and other bodies and love them every day for a new, pure and free love.
I would like people to dance more, sing more, play more. Always, however, anywhere.
I would like people to complain less and understand that from difficulties something good can arise..while complaints just turn away beautiful things.
I would like people to realize the paradox of life . That life is not just one. That we don’t have dreams just when we sleep and we don’t live only when we are awake.
I would like people to die everyday to reborn the next day.
I would like people to die every moment of their life in order to live it as if it was always the first and the last.
I would like people to be happy for others even if they are living sad moments. Because no one can be happy alone .
I would like people to understand that happiness should be shared and that life must be shared, that everything must be shared.
I would like people to abandon the formalities and appearances and marry spontaneity.
I would like people to live smoothly with everyone everywhere.
I would like people to eat the past, absorb the best from it and shit the worst.
I would like people to live in the present with the knowledge of what they live and why.
I would like people to speak, spit compliments, shout positivity.
I would like people to be free from the chains and devour life.
I would like people to devour each other and eat Love.
I would like people to recognize the God that is within each of us and kiss him every day.
I would like people to do everything they like, it doesn’t matter what. I would like them to do it just because they want, because they feel like that.
I would like people to transform judgments into reflections and problems into solutions.
I would like people to free strengths and weaknesses to make them dance together.
I would like people to stop to see the joy of living as madness and spontaneity as madness.
I would like people to burn the concept of normality.
Normal is all that is spontaneous.

Jealousy

I decided to talk about jealousy, a dear topic for many…maybe for everyone.
I will try to tell you what I think about it..

First, the concept of jealousy has to be related with the concept of loving yourself because, in my opinion, if you are jealous it means you don’t love yourself. This is the key point, the basis of every jealous situations. I could not say more, but I want to get involved a little in this dense and impenetrable invisible prison called “jealousy”.

Generally, the state of jealousy is exercised by those who live relationships with insecurity, anxiety and possession. I believe that jealousy does not arise simply from the fear of losing a person, but it arises mainly from the fear of sharing that person.. And we cannot think that the person we love or that loves us, can be loved by someone else or love someone else at the same time…The fear that this shared love will be extended to other people it’s mostly dictated by the fear of all fears, i.e. the fear of contact: the thing that scares us most is that the person we love can touch or be touched by someone else. A fear so great that most of the time flows into the pathetic, when a simple look can set fire to most of the indomitable spirits, touching even deeper than a hand. A look that, for the jealous, can appear as a real betrayal: the jealous becomes the witness of an actual sexual act. He hears cries that burn inside. He/she feels naked, as if his/her body was suddenly stripped of all dignity, worn out and squeezed to the bone…a body that have to be thrown away.
The person that has received the glance instead appears as a flower just bloomed, eager to light and generous to donate his nectar. You cannot compete with it. It’s chaos.
However, this situation falls on the pathological when the exchange of glances in question becomes purely imaginary because it’s born in the imaginative mind of the jealous. A mind which is self- projecting a new film that runs fast and covers, envelops and crushes the reality, till destroying it … A reality that has now yielded his place to the imagination for a nice little trip one-way!

It does not make sense to wait for it to return.

Recurrent situation:
Imagine being in a group of people, friends. Among these there is the one you like, that you love. During a conversation with the others of the group, unknown people start to take part in the conversation and someone of them starts to talk with the person you like and an exchange of glances, smiles and friendly jokes begins between them. How would you feel? The jealous would feel decentralized, ousted, threatened..

The film has long since begun.
The second time comes so soon but it never ends.
It’s always a fucking endless film.

Jealousy is a cold and dark tunnel.
A maze of nettles.
You feel lost,
you don’t see anything,
you suffer.
You suffer. You suffer. You suffer.
Yes, damn… you suffer!!!

Well, either this is a world of masochists or it’s a world of mindless people!
A world of directors who live their paranoid film of which they are the only spectators.

The jealous generally blames another for his/her suffering. His/her jealousy is always justified!
In a society where the desire is seen as a failure, and a relationship as a possession, suffering is almost a goal to achieve. It’s an ongoing competition to see who suffers the most.
Happy and carefree people are out of fashion. They’re crazy!
While the jealous sees every intruder as a likely challenger, the fool would see it as a likely friend, or even a likely lover.
The jealous sees the triangle as a threat while the fool sees it as a promise.
“The geometry is not a crime!” (Renato Zero, Triangolo)

But…do you love yourself?
I was a chronic ex jealous! I know how you feel..
What’s a feeling for you?
Do you think that it is something programmable? Something manageable? Something that you can crack down on command? No, of course it’s not.

Put in your mind: YOU CANNOT MANAGE THE FEELINGS OF THE PERSON YOU LOVE!
I personally would not want lovers whose feelings are not entirely spontaneous.
If the person I love, loves someone else too… what can I do?
I can only decide if continue sharing my love with him/her or not. But I certainly cannot force him/her to reciprocate my feelings nor to love just me.
In addition, jealousy has the power to destroy any feeling of love that already exists, so I do not really see the profitable side.

It’s not easy to share and live a perspective like that, but I believe that our peace and our health are always at the first place. Simply ask to yourself, “why should I not be jealous?”

And the only answer is: BECAUSE I LOVE MYSELF!

LOVER HAS NO FAULTS

October 10, 2013

Premise:
1. For convenience, I’m writing to a female reader, but everything regards, overturning the point of view, even the male audience.
2. When I talk about the “horned” I refer to an acquaintance or a stranger, but never to a friend.
3. The situation doesn’t include the presence of children.

Each of you, at least once in your life, has been in the condition to desire the other women’s partner and/or to have been desired from him. Someone has just thought about it (utopian lover), others have sent small “romantic” signals but nothing more (potential lover), someone has instead attempted a courtship and then has given up the idea (affected lover), and others have participated fully in the betrayal (real lover). Regardless of the category of “lover” in which each of you has belonged, certainly questions/ thoughts like these have flashed in your mind:

“Can I try despite he’s engaged?”, ” What will happen if the wife comes to know it?”, “Why should I rankle her girlfriend even though she does not deserve it?”, “Will he ever love me as he loves her?”, “Why should I feel regret? If he cheats her then he does not love her!”, “If he is betraying her how can I be sure he will not do the same with me?”, “I do not want to be that kind of girl that ruin other people’s love/family”, “I would never do it because I would never want someone do the same to me”, “I don’t want to ruin my reputation” etc.

The situation is simpler than you think .

The problem is certainly not “don’t do to others what you do not want others do to you” .. this is one of the most hypocritical teachings. I reformulate the sentence as follows: “Do not do unto others what you’ll never do in general, regardless of yourself” , otherwise you wont do something just because you don’t want to receive the same treatment, and certainly not because you feel it’s really something wrong. It’s a bit like giving a gift for Christmas just with the expectation to receive another one (or do not do it just because you have not already received one before). So, don’t think too much about why or how, or if you could or could not be the lover of that person, because if you have never wanted to be the lover of anyone, you wouldn’t have never even asked to yourself these kind of questions. Here there is just yourself. The only question you need to ask to yourself is “Do I really want to be someone’s mistress?”. If the answer is yes, then do it. And do not feel guilty about the potential horned, because the fault is not yours. Trust me because if you refuse to be his mistress, he will find another women right behind you. The potential horned is already designed to become horned because she has on her side a fake boyfriend who acts a fake love and that gives fake flowers on Valentine’s Day… Indeed..perhaps at the beginning you can feel a little bit guilty but later you will realize that you have done a good action because you’re going to ruin a fake “family”, that has no sense to exist because of its lie, and if the horned have a piece of brain that still works, you will open her eyes before it will be too late for her. And if she has a shred of common sense, she will thank you. Otherwise, if she is a blind_stupid_poor girl, she will be angry with you, she will offend you in every way possible, she will try to tarnish your reputation, she will try to let you feel guilty giving you the blame for everything… she will pretend to leave the fake boyfriend (that in her eyes is after all a tender and weak teddy without faults) and then she will go back to him for being happily horned again. A real horned into a sea of ​​fiction.

Lover has no faults…

… except to do not love herself enough to do not be the mistress of anyone.

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED ABOUT IT? YES, I HAVE.

October 7, 2013

Have you ever wondered who invented this or that word? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered why that word? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if there will ever be allowed you to change the meaning of a word or invent a new one? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered what would happen if the true meaning of the words is just the opposite of what it is? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered how it would be a world without words? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered why some people have had the chance to write a dictionary? Yes,I have.

Have you ever wondered whether the explanations of a dictionary are totally right? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered what you need to be able to write a dictionary? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered why you have to trust a dictionary? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered which differences a dictionary and a Bible have? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if the Bible is false as much as its definition in a dictionary? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if your Italian teacher has ever wondered about it? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if your priest has ever wondered about it? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if your parents that have attended you to school and to the church have ever wondered about it? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered if an animal devoid of the ability to speak has ever wondered about it? Yes, I have.

Have you ever wondered what a doggie would think about a dictionary or the Bible? Yes, I have.
I think he/she would not give a shit about it and he/she would just wag his/her tail in a meadow!

Have you ever wondered if I would do the same?

Yes.

HAVE YOU EVER LOOKED AT THE SKY?

October 18, 2013

I was struck by a phrase that my father told me years ago:

“When people leave their house they always look at the ground. Have you ever looked at the sky?”.

My father is not a very deep person, or rather, he is deep in his own way. You must be able to capture in his thousand&formal speeches, something that transcends the adiministrative_paternal_routine. Well, that phrase was part of that something and it became part of myself forever.

Do you look at the sky when you leave your house or when you are walking on the street? Or you’re staring at the time/sms/facebook on the phone, or you are worrying if you have fixed up in good way your shoes/pants/jacket?

I think it’s worth stepping on a dog shit sometimes in order to admire the infinity of the sky with its nuances, the shape of its clouds, the sun’s rays, the wake of a plane thatwhoknowswhereitisgoing… I think it’s worth even let irrigate yourself from few drops of rain somethimes and then, personally…

everything makes me feel

free,

in harmony                                                                                         with myself                        and

with the whole,

the sky speaks to me

and

I answer.

And from that day when my father asked me that question, I began to notice the architectural decorations of the upper parts of the buildings in my town that I had never noticed before. How is it possible that I’ve never noticed it?

I was surprised at how many things I discovered just looking up sometimes…

Monologue

October 27, 2013

Be far from prejudices. Don’t rush into the arms of a thousand&thousand affable lovers. And don’t inject alcohol into your veins just to make your life uninhibited. Appearance grieves.. you don’t need money, and time does not run, it’s not too fast for you. Listen to others, don’t interrupt them when they are speaking with your speeches, with your problems or with your valuable advices. Listen to yourself. Spoke to yourself. Try to know what you do and why you do it. Be conscious and be aware, about everything. Don’t hurt yourself. You hurt yourself and you know it. You are unsatisfied and you know it. But? You are a conscious victim, and this destroys you. You have often thought that the solution would be to be an unwitting victim, like those who are unaware of everything and happy at all. But no, you’re a conscious victim and you know that you will never be unconscious. The only thing you can do is get out of this state of victimhood. But how? Why realizing the situation is not enough? What do you really miss? Your fear of loneliness has always brought you to throw yourself into the arms of ordinary people, friends of convenience … for what? Nothing. So many people, but nothing. So much alchool, but nothing. A lot of drugs, but nothing. Lots of music, but nothing. So much food, but nothing. So many clothes, but nothing. A lot of jewelry, but nothing. A lot of money but … nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

Reflect.

Do you need everything that surrounds you? You haven’t lost time, time is you. Everything you do has a reason. People you meet have a reason. You meet some people for a reason. Time is you and you do what you feel when you feel it. You have never wasted time and now if you think you did it, it’s just the opposite because finally you can watch with outer eye behind you. It’s time to direct your energies on different horizons. If you feel comfortable doing something, do it, you’re not wrong. What’s wrong at least? Something could be a mistake for you, but for someone else could be the solution, the rightest thing at the time. We are all different. You are you. Your time is you. You may receive the best advice in the world and do not understand its value because it is not your time, it’s not the right time for you. Each of us has the own right time. Don’t tell others what is right for them. Share your knowledge. Share your love. Help others to find their way. The way that allows each of us to understand who we are and what we want. What we want to be. Being. Existing and sharing ourself. Do not keep your knowledge just for yourself. Share it. But, don’t ever raise yourself above someone else. Get in touch with others, open them the door that allows to access to your knowledge and let them come and go whenever they want. It’s up to them to grasp the right value when they are ready..it’s not up to you to decide or demand it. You may not know when the time is right for someone else. Do not judge them. Help them. Help yourself. Accept the knowledge that someone else share with you. Don’t see it as an imposition. Image everything on you and analize the effects. Follow the flow of your energy, let your energy flow towards those of others and analize the effects. If you feel you want to do it, if it gives you a deep lightness, if it creates harmony and balance, do it. It doesn’t matter if you do not know what to do at that exact moment, but try to be aware of what is not good for you, for your essence. You’ll understand it when you least expect it and you’ll see a bright light. Do not be afraid of that light, look at her and let her to blind you. It’s the light of awareness and infinite time. It’s the light of energies and feelings. It’s the light that guides all generations, those who gave birth to you and those who will come after you. You were not born by chance, and your life has a meaning. All of us has a meaning. And no one has sense alone. You were born from this light and you leave it. Family, society, history, economy, emotions, etc. in which you moved your steps, have brought you away from this light. All of us were taken away by this light. It’s necessary to move away from it and then find it again when the time is right. Only at that time you can gather its true essence. It’s a special light and once you found it, it will not abandon you again.

When you judge others, you are judging yourself. When you feel superior to others, you’re burying yourself. When you don’t listen to others, you’re not listening to yourself. When you harm others, you’re hurting yourself. When you cheat, you’re betraying yourself. When you blame someone else, you’re blaming yourself.

Don’t do it. And if you do it, it’s simply because your right time has yet to come. I don’t judge you for this, I just wish you good luck.

I love you.

I “Share” Therefore I “Am”

Humans : Technology = Evolution : Degradation

Simply yourself

Being simply yourself…well, it’s not so simple. Or rather, it is easy to be but hard to understand.

Moreover, being yourself is a dynamic, changeable, adaptable and unpredictable concept. You cannot program to be yourself, it’s not a static and one-sided choice. No, it’s an explosion of probability. And being yourself, perhaps, is just let yourself live each of these probabilities.

Being yourself doesn’t mean being in a certain way , but do not preclude the possibility of being in any way.

Once you understand it, you will be it.

Do you think that being yourself is equivalent to dress alternative, have 10 tattoos, send to fuck who you want when you want, get drunk as a shit every night, try shamelessly with a girl or make the lamps in June?

I think being yourself is equivalent to smile at life without shame. Smiling at strangers on the street. Smiling at a little wagging dog. Smiling at a flower kissed by the sun . Smiling in front of the mirror. Smiling at yourself.

And whatever you do, whatever you dress, whatever you seem to be… your smile will tell the truth . Certainly not the smile that you print in command on your face when you take a picture. No. But the smile of your soul. A soul without fear of failing, of being judged . A soul without fear of suffering and without fear of being happy .

You are so afraid to be happy.

In medio stat virtus_english.

September 11, 2013

“In medio stat virtus” said Latins .

Virtue lies in the middle.

Being extremists and radicals is much easier than staying in the middle.

Being in the middle involves balance, weight , choice, selection. Selecting from the two extremes the best and getting them to behave together.

Well.. it’s not so easy .

If the person with who you are in love tells you that he/she is really in love with you, would you be happy? Well, I think so.

And if he/she tells you to wait for an indefinite period of time during which this love will not fade, will you continue to be happy for your love?

In this case the extreme choices are two :
1 . Deleting this person from your life.
2 . Immediately reaching him/her wherever he/she is.

The middle choice instead is this:
Being happy of the love that binds you to that person and having faith in this love even if there is temporarily no physical contact. Having patience and trusting in yourselves and in the other.

The distance is frightening.

And we pretend to defeat this fear choosing one extreme or the other. But this behaviour belongs to a coward, insecure, weak, and scared person.

We are surrounded by people who are afraid. Fear of exposure, fear to expose own ideas, fear of fear, fear of being judged by others, fear of new experiences, fear of the dark, insects, black man, fear of the unknown, fear of death.

Fear of the distance.

The society feeds us with fear and the result is a bunch of morons around us.

Distance is a stupid fear. If we are afraid of the distance is because we don’t believe in ourselves. Fear is uncertainty. We must not think too much, be fear or doubtful. Certainty wins fear. If you really love that person and if you are sure that this love is corresponded, then… why being afraid? If this person has meant and means a lot for you and if you are sure that you he/she will always stay inside your heart … Do you have to be afraid or fucking happy?

Be happy and do not be afraid.

Weaknesses are not innate! We create them or they are automatically created in us without our realizing it. But as they are revenue, they can go to hell. You just have to work at it.

The past bears heavily on our opinion and on the way we interpret things. The previous experience reappeared always to break our balls.

And we must not be afraid of the future. The fact that it is uncertain should make you happy. If your next 50 years are already written I think you will suicide tomorrow.

The distance scares, but the energy that binds two people does not know kilometers, planes, trains or cars. It does not know space or time. There is and it will always exist. When there isn’t it just because it has not been discovered yet, but in the moment it is made ​​light of it, it will shine of life forever.

And do not be fooled by all these modern loves that arise and vanish into thin air, because they do not have true energy!

We must overcome our fears to allow this energy to vibrate towards new horizons, no brakes.

If you think you have fear, you will have fear.

If you are afraid, things will go wrong.

If you think you can not find a job, you will not find a job.

If you think you lose the person you love, then you will lose him/her.

Who’s afraid always fails because he/she fails with himself/herself first.

The secret is to work on yourself. Do not abandon yourself to anger and fear. Be strong and confident that everything revolves around you like you would be a sun! 🙂

What does it mean being engaged?

May 30, 2013

I stopped getting engaged long time ago.

In fact I’ve never been really engaged.

Let me explain why.

Usually people get engaged because they are in love. So far, everybody seems to agree.

Obviously it is a mere illusion. After all, it has never happened that everybody would agree about something, not even about death.

Moreover, love is a questionable feeling, it certainly has nothing to do with what is called ‘engagement’ because I believe that it is impossible to love one and only one person, whether for a moment or always. Also you have to love yourself first before loving someone else, so you always love a minimum of two people.

When I love somebody, I love somebody. Enough. Stop.

Engagement?

But what is it?

Let me explain what I mean through some definitions about what is ‘ENGAGEMENT’:

  • ILLUSORY AGREEMENT OF PROPERTY . Attempt to link and condemn on your side forever the person you ‘love’;
  • FEAR OF SOLITUDE. Desperate for a certainty, to never be alone;
  • DON’T LOVE YOURSELF. Need to define yourself within a ‘official’ relationship;
  • SOURCE OF PRIDE. Attempt to increase self-esteem through the eyes of others;
  • WIFE AND MISTRESS. Security of being loved by someone and being able to have sex with someone else;
  • SOMEONE WHO IS WAITING FOR YOU FOREVER. Need to know that there is someone who is there for you when you go back home from work, college or one of your cheatings;
  • FEELING YOURSELF IMPORTANT FOR SOMEONE. Need to feel important for someone more than for yourself;
  • FEELING USEFUL. Provide for a lack of self-esteem feeling useful for someone else;
  • HYPOCRISY. Hypocritical self-belief that you need only that person;
  • ILLUSION. Delude yourself and the other person to be born to be together forever;
  • PROMOTER OF CONSUMISM. Spending money at Christmas, Valentine’s Day, anniversary, month anniversary, first-film anniversary, first-kiss, first-time anniversary…
  • END OF DIET. End of an endless diet;
  • FICTION. Fake satisfaction and happiness;
  • SEX INSURED. Security of being able to have sex when you want without having to pay anyone or relying on ‘unknown’ or being judged;
  • LOVE INSURED. Receiving always affection, deserved or not;
  • CHEATING INSURED. Voluntary imprisonment of themselves that makes cheating juicy.
  • FORMALITY.

And this is ‘LOVE’:

  • WALKING
  • A BEAUTIFUL DREAM
  • UNDERSTANDING
  • BEING UNDERSTOOD
  • FREEDOM
  • SHARING
  • A LETTER
  • RUNNING
  • A DROP OF SWEAT
  • DRAWING
  • DRIVING A MOTORCYCLE
  • A MEETING
  • A FIGHT
  • LOOKING THE SKY
  • A CONCERT
  • READING BOOK
  • SLEEPING
  • STUDYING
  • WORKING
  • A SMILE
  • A HUG
  • FEELING
  • A JOURNEY
  • A FILM
  • A SONG
  • RIDING A BIKE
  • DRINKING
  • EATING
  • HAVING SEX
  • MAKING LOVE
  • LOVING
  • LIVING

Loving is living.

Loving is not to be engaged.

And being engaged does not mean to love.

And there’s no need to tell you that ‘to live’ is a collective verb.

Love! = Live! = Love yourself and who lives with you!

Fake face for a good impression.

It’s useless that you are there looking at me with that strange behavior. If you have something to say, speak. Basically I do not care what’s on your mind, but even if I don’t like it, life has placed me in a position in which I’ve necessarily to relate with you. So I relate with you. I think. I speak. I don’t just look at you, I don’t just inspect you, I don’t just judge you. I’m not a spectator of your life. I interact with you. I express myself. I express my ideas. And your ideas? You cannot play this game with me. I can read into your mind. I can perceive any symptom of resentment or disagreement through your voice, your eyes or your movements. That’s why I hate all of your fake smiles or condescension. I’d like to have a verbal fight / confrontation with you. But this is impossible. You don’t like to speak about your opinions, to express yourself so much. You prefer a quiet life, you’re for the peace in the world.

Long time ago someone said that if you act like a stupid it’s because you don’t want to take part in the war. Maybe he or she was just talking about you. You don’t convert your thoughts into words. No, you don’t do it because it’s too dangerous and you risk to take part in a war that you don’t like or you would not be able to deal with. A war that is nothing more than a mutual exchange of points of view. And the most detestable side of you, it’s not that you don’t have your own point of view. Indeed. Of course you have it. But you keep it for yourself.

Tell me something.

I’m really curious to know it. I’m dying to know how you feel to be liked by everyone. Is it satisfactory? And is it satisfactory to lock yourself in yourself and show to the world a face of cock that doesn’t bark or bite? Is it satisfactory that no one has never said fuck off to you? I don’t expect you to answer. You won’t do it because it will be against your true nature and your principles. You will just answer some nonsense sentences like “forget it” or “it’s not worth to discuss it” if your courage is on your side, otherwise you will dismiss me with a smile or an emoticon. Yes, emoticons. They are more fashion and famous these times. Who knows maybe you might even stumble across an allusive link on facebook which shows a mentality similar to yours. Then you’ll be happy to share it. It’s not so much risky to expose themselves in this way, no?

Moreover, of course you have a best friend with whom you can vent your most hidden malice, a loyal friend who will not ever object to you. An easy life, is it not? Who knows maybe you disseminate only peace and love also with your dear friend.

After all, why should you risk?

The birth of friendship.

Yes, maybe you don’t know that, but friendship was born in 1871. Young people were sad and lonely before. Loneliness and monotony hovered over the streets of the village, across the windows of the sad country houses, echoing in the empty glasses of beer piled on the counter of a bar. The atmosphere was dark, people were closed in themselves and they did not use to communicate each other, they avoided to see into the eyes of the other people along the way, no one was smiling. Everything was black until 1871 when Mr. X demonstrated the operation of his device that he called “mobileaushudfjsfkj”. Even if the record for having invented the friendship seems to belong to Mr. Y who was able to realize an electrical device capable of communicating at a distance already in the fifties of the nineteenth century. Then in the 1800 and something, a friend of MR X introduced a machine for the electronic transmission of musical sounds by vibrating a finger under the influence of an electromagnetic field.

Unfortunatly this device was not able to transmit voice, but only sounds. So everyone continued to be sad. Everyone lived in despair, wasting away for the inability to communicate with the friend living on the next door. Everything was sad until it was invented by XXY, the handset. It was born when XXY had the idea to tie a microphone and a receiver to a stick, so you can have a free hand to masturbate, and the other at last to communicate. So everyone who was sad to run among the meadows, that was sad to leave empty glasses of beer at the bar of the village, that was forced to confront the reality of every day life, all of these sad people became happy now. Yes, there was nothing more rewarding and happy than frolicking with a handset. Finally, a device that allowed everyone to call their friends and share their dreams and opinions, finally a device that allowed everyone to call their friends and tell them which kind of beers they loved more the week before in the bar of the village, finally a device that allowed people to forward their voice towards other friends. You know that we have on the tongue a microchip installed at the time of birth to enable voice transmission? Without it we could never communicate, that’s why the friendship was born only at the turn of 1800 and 1900 when auxiliary devices were annexed to the incomplete human nature for the improvement of living conditions.

It must be said, however, that friendship was incomplete. The days were less gloomy, hearts and minds were less oppressed… but, deeply something was still missing .. It was the sight! How can friendship exist without the sight? The sight was born in the second half of the twentieth century. When the scientist Doctor G in collaboration with the technologist Lord J elaborated microscopic electromagnetic devices to be applied on the optic nerve which would have allowed the visual feedback of an image transmitted in a monitor. The rampant happiness in having acquired this vital sense led to a immense feeling of friendship and to a passionate love towards own lovely monitor.

There was only one small drawback: the microscopic electromagnetic devices only reproduce images in black and white. Rivers of bicolor friendship had to flow under the bridges before people became able to recognize the color of a lawn, or a beer, or the color of the eyes of a friend. A proportion directly proportional: monitor: monitor = monitor: monitor. A impeccable proportion whose stratospheric result was the real true friendship. Everything was going for the best of ways, everything was going reallyreallygood, friendship here, friendship there, monitor on this side, monitor on the other side … Finally there was no more sad people on the street or at the bar, no lawn sad, no sad soccer ball slamming to the windows.. Nothing of so much sadness, but only happy and smiling friends near their handsets and trustful monitor. A happiness sosososo much big that when MrLordFly X and his brother Y announced, to the new victims of friendship, the great news: “Finally we no longer need to hear and to speak each other” people were more and more happy. Yes, next to the images that used to run on the monitor was applied a system of reciprocal responses and counter-responses, in a fast and mutual alternation of friendly exchanges of friendship, a stratospheric invention that the superEnglishtechnodoctor McFlurry called “Chat”.

I wish a good friendship to everybody.

Soul mate? It’s a bluff!

Women, men, your soul mate doesn’t exist. Or maybe let’s put it on another level…there are so many kindred spirits as are our characteristics, ideas, tastes, trends, opinions.. Do you have only one characteristic? Do you have only one idea? Do you have only one taste? Do you have only one trend? Do you have only one opinion? NO! Then explain to me, stupid women and stupid men, how can you believe that there is just one soul mate for you! Let’s assume that religion had never existed and that nobody had ever said that the man should mate with the woman, or that a woman should mate with the man, or that a man should mate with just one woman, or that a woman should mate with just one man, or that a woman doesn’t have to mate with another woman or a man shouldn’t mate with another man. Let’s assume that the sacrament of marriage had never existed and that nobody had ever said that the woman and the man should find their soul mate with whom spending the rest of their lives. Let’s assume that you had been the first human to populate the earth .. Would you have ever make the scruples that you do now? Would you have ever act and reason as you do now? NO! Because there would have been nobody before you to tell you how to act! You are right to be jealous of your boyfriend or girlfriend because he or she may, every day, meet interesting people like you or more than you, or at least interesting in a different way. Billion people inhabit the earth and maybe, who knows, even the universe … what could force you to be just with one person for the rest of your life? Love is a wonderful feeling, perhaps the first among feelings .. and because it’s the first feeling, it cannot be felt in a unique and one-sided way. The world is full of people waiting to be loved, one or two in the same time, and why not three, four, five, ten, all at once. We can love different people for different reasons. Why should we necessarily choose one and only one person? And it is not about being assholes or not to have heart, on the contrary, it is to have a heart so big to be open to any opportunity. A person can be a part of your life, but he or she will never be your life. Only you are your life and you can be a part of the life of someone else. But you’ll never be his or her life. If you think that all I have said is bullshit and if you believe in the soul mate, it’s only because you are fucking afraid to be alone. Love each other. Love. Everybody.

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