Back to the future – Blog

Italian & English Articles! Personal reflections on life, relationships and energy that shines inside and outside each of us. Enjoy ♥



Nothing and no one can complete us, but only enrich us.

None of us is a perfect human being, but we are perfect in our completeness.

In which sense?

In the sense that everyone has got the necessary tools to achieve his/her completeness.

Then… why do we always feel somehow incomplete? Why do we rush so much searching things and people that can complete us? What do we really miss?

Actually we don’t miss anything, but the problem lies in the fact that we always feel that we miss something.

For example, if our stomach gives us a nod of emptiness, we run immediately in search of food and then we eat and keep eating as if there wasn’t any tomorrow. We don’t even give too much importance to what we are eating, because what matters is that we fill our sense of emptiness! Sometimes we are not even hungry, but it’s just our feeling of incompleteness that let us feel hungry and let us believe that we can fix that gap with food ….YUM, YUM, YUM!

Also, when we feel alone and incomplete, we always run to do shopping, but we don’t understand that it is only our wardrobe that gets filled while our soul empties more and more …BUY, BUY! It’s nice occasionally to buy something as a gift for ourselves…but what usually happens is that we sell our soul to those objects by transforming ourselves into objects as well.

The same thing often happens with our heart. If it gives us the slightest feeling of suffering or loneliness, here we are running immediately in search of affection, love, friends, lovers…and if it doesn’t work, we dive into alcohol, drugs…..SPLASH! Is it really our heart to speak to us, to lie to us?

If we perceive a light feeling of deep silence, we rush to call a friend on the phone, to switch on the TV or listening to music. We always need to communicate or listen to someone or something to talk with, to be listened by….BLA, BLA, BLA!

Do we really need to fill us in this way or rush so desperately in search of something or someone to fulfill us as soon as possible? And, most important, do we really feel satisfied after? Did we really solved this lack? We probably believe we did it for the first few seconds, minutes or days…but then what?

Then we find ourselves panting again and looking for something else…and so on forever. We suffer, we run, we try, we find, we rejoice, we lose, we cry….we suffer again, run again, try again..and so on.

The problem is that as long as we continue to look outside for the solution to this feeling of lack, we will end only to find ephemeral and illusory solutions.

Where is that instead we do have really have to look?

Within yourself. This is the only answer. It is not easy at all. It’s not easy because the outside always seems so beautiful and bright, while the inside is dark and things do not appear clearly, then, it’s frightening. It is not easy to sit with yourself, in front of yourself and “talk”. And the only way to really talk to you is to be silent. There are answers that only silence can give and, as darkness, silence scares. Yes, it scares because it could be suddenly interrupted by something unexpected. Yes, it scares because it leaves us naked in front of the mirror of our soul. Being naked scares. Being naked, in silence, in the darkness of ourselves, scares. Not everyone has the courage to do it, and many of those who embrace the challenge, midway take a step back frightened and find themselves back to square one. It is not easy, but after every climb there is always a descent.

Today’s society has grown in the philosophy of NEED. We grew up as incomplete beings that always NEED something or someone to be complete, happy and completely happy. Everything is now advertised and sold to satisfy our needs…

“SELLING EMOTIONS” was the headline of a newspaper article that I read about ten years ago…

Everything and every person has a particular and special role in our life, but everything and every person has to be seen as a means of enrichment and expansion and not erroneously as a means of completion…as a need! There is nothing outside of ourselves that can complete us; however there is an immense variety of experiences and people who can enrich us.

It’s hard to accept it. It’s difficult to be “self-sufficient”. It’s hard to really love yourself without feeling the need of external confirmations, without giving too much importance to others’ opinions, without having always a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold onto. Nowadays you can just look out the window, watch the TV or walk in a shopping center to find yourself inundated with “pre-packaged solutions” full of additives that “suicide” your soul.

We don’t need it!

If we meet on our journey, people who give us love and serenity, we must be happy and thankful for that… but we must also see it as a very nice meeting, as a fabulous time of sharing…and nothing more! We meet people but do not belong to each other, never. Nothing and no one can complete us, but only enrich us. Nobody can fill our sense of emptiness, because this would be like seeing the other as a physical object to get stuck into yourself, like a puzzle piece missing, and leave it there forever…impossible!!! Not even the real objects can complete us…how can they complete us anyway? They are OBJECTS!

In this path within yourself you must remember one thing:

In order to achieve your inner peace it’s not enough to find refuge on your own peaceful island. Knowing how to be alone with yourself is an unmistakable quality but it must not be confused with the only way of resolution. Who has really reached a state of balance with him/herself is the one who has managed to find a balance with him/herself, with the surrounding reality and, above all, with him/herself in this reality. Reality that includes a host of things, situations and people…many of which often create unease to us. Inconveniences that willingly are our best teachers of life, because they put us to the test and turn on in us the alarm and the desire of resolution.

20 strangers kissing for the first time

Whether it’s true that these people were strangers or not I don’t care. I love this video. At least…why not? Why should not we kiss a stranger? Because he/she could be a murderess? Because he/she might have diseases? Because we don’t know where he/she was born, how old is he/she, if he/she uses drugs, if he/she has a boyfriend/girlfriend, if he/she is a criminal or what? How many times has happened to meet someone and to set an appointment with him/her? And how many times did you go to that appointment and did you kiss that person? Don’t you believe that at the second, third or fourth date that person is still a stranger? You can discover aspects of dear friends after years. Your partner may appear as a completely different person after years of marriage. You can love a person for a lifetime and one day seeing him/her unexpectedly as a stranger. Do not recognize someone anymore because he/she did or said something that you would never expected. Who is a stranger at least? Life is not enough to know ourselves, so how can you believe to know perfectly someone else? Where is the feeling in kissing a stranger you say? And if the feeling was in the kiss itself? And if the feeling was linked to the anonymity and to the fact that we can love someone even for a single moment in a totally disinterested way? An unpretentious kiss without any expectations. Maybe we should kiss always in this way the people we love. So..why not? We could be one big family. Some of you now could reduce my thoughts to a big pornographic orgy. No. But why not an orgy of feelings? Orgies of emotions and sharings. Hugs and kisses. Smiles and caresses.

A kiss,


We always talk about love as possession without thinking that the possessiveness often reigns also in friendships.
We are taught from an early age that we have to have the best friend…. OUR best friend.
When I was a child I had to “book” my best friend, otherwise I risked that someone could precede me and forced me to choose another one.
The best friend has privileges that other friends do not have, but also the best friend expects something that other friends do not expect.
The best friends, as the lovers, expect the sms of goodnight/good morning, or the “I miss you/ I love you” weekly … and also a monthly average of 4 hearts on their Facebook wall!
No coincidence that I decided to not officialize no longer any relationship!
Why do you need to sign a contract in every kind of relationship?
Can you live without giving a name to all the things you do and all the relationships that you live?
Can you just live?

I don’t need to know your name or what you do in your life to love you.
I don’t need to know how many times you think about me per day or how often you contact me to believe you’re a good friend.
I don’t need to have met you long time ago to love you and I don’t need to see you every fucking day to think we are close friends!
And I do not need to receive constant attentions from you to be happy about our friendship.
But above all, I don’t need to obsessively repeating my feelings for you …
I don’t speak just for moving the air, that’s why if I said to you “I love you” 3 months ago..it’s still valid, dammit, even without its obsessive repetition!
And less you will expect such stupid confirmations from me, most I’ll give to you!

Don’t be offended if tomorrow I will love a stranger as much as I love you.
Don’t be offended if I’ll spend the Saturday evening with him/her or if I’ll decide to not go out at all.
And don’t be offended if you don’t keep up to date on my life 24 hours 24.
Maybe I cannot or maybe I don’t want … in any case, whatever has happened, happens or will happen.. it has been, it is and it will be always SPONTANEOUS!
Be happy for everything I do or I don’t do because it’s natural, pure, free!
What else do you want?

What could be more beautiful than the spontaneity?
I think nothing.
I think that anything that is not natural can be really nice.
A friend of mine once said: “Please contact me only when you truly want to do it and never because you fear that if you don’t do it it can have a negative impact on our relationship..”
Trust that everything that is not spontaneous does not lead to anything good and it is destined to end, or be fake and suffered.

As soon as we are afraid of losing those around us, we have already lost ourselves.
We see ourselves as incomplete people, with empty compartments that things and people absolutely have to fill, but it’s not like that..
There is nothing to fill, there is just so much to expand, infinitesimally ..
Each person can enrich us, everyone is basic but no one is indispensable!
There’s no need to cling forever to one or more people in particular.
We are all passengers!
You should be happy for every friend you known, regardless of whether this friendship is to last days, months or years!
Some friends share with you just one day of their life, but it is a day that lasts forever!

What is possession?
Not even we belong completely to ourselves!
We are abstract matter and concrete energy.

I see


I decided to talk about jealousy, a dear topic for many…maybe for everyone.
I will try to tell you what I think about it..

First, the concept of jealousy has to be related with the concept of loving yourself because, in my opinion, if you are jealous it means you don’t love yourself. This is the key point, the basis of every jealous situations. I could not say more, but I want to get involved a little in this dense and impenetrable invisible prison called “jealousy”.

Generally, the state of jealousy is exercised by those who live relationships with insecurity, anxiety and possession. I believe that jealousy does not arise simply from the fear of losing a person, but it arises mainly from the fear of sharing that person.. And we cannot think that the person we love or that loves us, can be loved by someone else or love someone else at the same time…The fear that this shared love will be extended to other people it’s mostly dictated by the fear of all fears, i.e. the fear of contact: the thing that scares us most is that the person we love can touch or be touched by someone else. A fear so great that most of the time flows into the pathetic, when a simple look can set fire to most of the indomitable spirits, touching even deeper than a hand. A look that, for the jealous, can appear as a real betrayal: the jealous becomes the witness of an actual sexual act. He hears cries that burn inside. He/she feels naked, as if his/her body was suddenly stripped of all dignity, worn out and squeezed to the bone…a body that have to be thrown away.
The person that has received the glance instead appears as a flower just bloomed, eager to light and generous to donate his nectar. You cannot compete with it. It’s chaos.
However, this situation falls on the pathological when the exchange of glances in question becomes purely imaginary because it’s born in the imaginative mind of the jealous. A mind which is self- projecting a new film that runs fast and covers, envelops and crushes the reality, till destroying it … A reality that has now yielded his place to the imagination for a nice little trip one-way!

It does not make sense to wait for it to return.

Recurrent situation:
Imagine being in a group of people, friends. Among these there is the one you like, that you love. During a conversation with the others of the group, unknown people start to take part in the conversation and someone of them starts to talk with the person you like and an exchange of glances, smiles and friendly jokes begins between them. How would you feel? The jealous would feel decentralized, ousted, threatened..

The film has long since begun.
The second time comes so soon but it never ends.
It’s always a fucking endless film.

Jealousy is a cold and dark tunnel.
A maze of nettles.
You feel lost,
you don’t see anything,
you suffer.
You suffer. You suffer. You suffer.
Yes, damn… you suffer!!!

Well, either this is a world of masochists or it’s a world of mindless people!
A world of directors who live their paranoid film of which they are the only spectators.

The jealous generally blames another for his/her suffering. His/her jealousy is always justified!
In a society where the desire is seen as a failure, and a relationship as a possession, suffering is almost a goal to achieve. It’s an ongoing competition to see who suffers the most.
Happy and carefree people are out of fashion. They’re crazy!
While the jealous sees every intruder as a likely challenger, the fool would see it as a likely friend, or even a likely lover.
The jealous sees the triangle as a threat while the fool sees it as a promise.
“The geometry is not a crime!” (Renato Zero, Triangolo)

But…do you love yourself?
I was a chronic ex jealous! I know how you feel..
What’s a feeling for you?
Do you think that it is something programmable? Something manageable? Something that you can crack down on command? No, of course it’s not.

I personally would not want lovers whose feelings are not entirely spontaneous.
If the person I love, loves someone else too… what can I do?
I can only decide if continue sharing my love with him/her or not. But I certainly cannot force him/her to reciprocate my feelings nor to love just me.
In addition, jealousy has the power to destroy any feeling of love that already exists, so I do not really see the profitable side.

It’s not easy to share and live a perspective like that, but I believe that our peace and our health are always at the first place. Simply ask to yourself, “why should I not be jealous?”

And the only answer is: BECAUSE I LOVE MYSELF!


October 10, 2013

1. For convenience, I’m writing to a female reader, but everything regards, overturning the point of view, even the male audience.
2. When I talk about the “horned” I refer to an acquaintance or a stranger, but never to a friend.
3. The situation doesn’t include the presence of children.

Each of you, at least once in your life, has been in the condition to desire the other women’s partner and/or to have been desired from him. Someone has just thought about it (utopian lover), others have sent small “romantic” signals but nothing more (potential lover), someone has instead attempted a courtship and then has given up the idea (affected lover), and others have participated fully in the betrayal (real lover). Regardless of the category of “lover” in which each of you has belonged, certainly questions/ thoughts like these have flashed in your mind:

“Can I try despite he’s engaged?”, ” What will happen if the wife comes to know it?”, “Why should I rankle her girlfriend even though she does not deserve it?”, “Will he ever love me as he loves her?”, “Why should I feel regret? If he cheats her then he does not love her!”, “If he is betraying her how can I be sure he will not do the same with me?”, “I do not want to be that kind of girl that ruin other people’s love/family”, “I would never do it because I would never want someone do the same to me”, “I don’t want to ruin my reputation” etc.

The situation is simpler than you think .

The problem is certainly not “don’t do to others what you do not want others do to you” .. this is one of the most hypocritical teachings. I reformulate the sentence as follows: “Do not do unto others what you’ll never do in general, regardless of yourself” , otherwise you wont do something just because you don’t want to receive the same treatment, and certainly not because you feel it’s really something wrong. It’s a bit like giving a gift for Christmas just with the expectation to receive another one (or do not do it just because you have not already received one before). So, don’t think too much about why or how, or if you could or could not be the lover of that person, because if you have never wanted to be the lover of anyone, you wouldn’t have never even asked to yourself these kind of questions. Here there is just yourself. The only question you need to ask to yourself is “Do I really want to be someone’s mistress?”. If the answer is yes, then do it. And do not feel guilty about the potential horned, because the fault is not yours. Trust me because if you refuse to be his mistress, he will find another women right behind you. The potential horned is already designed to become horned because she has on her side a fake boyfriend who acts a fake love and that gives fake flowers on Valentine’s Day… Indeed..perhaps at the beginning you can feel a little bit guilty but later you will realize that you have done a good action because you’re going to ruin a fake “family”, that has no sense to exist because of its lie, and if the horned have a piece of brain that still works, you will open her eyes before it will be too late for her. And if she has a shred of common sense, she will thank you. Otherwise, if she is a blind_stupid_poor girl, she will be angry with you, she will offend you in every way possible, she will try to tarnish your reputation, she will try to let you feel guilty giving you the blame for everything… she will pretend to leave the fake boyfriend (that in her eyes is after all a tender and weak teddy without faults) and then she will go back to him for being happily horned again. A real horned into a sea of ​​fiction.

Lover has no faults…

… except to do not love herself enough to do not be the mistress of anyone.

What does it mean being engaged?

May 30, 2013

I stopped getting engaged long time ago.

In fact I’ve never been really engaged.

Let me explain why.

Usually people get engaged because they are in love. So far, everybody seems to agree.

Obviously it is a mere illusion. After all, it has never happened that everybody would agree about something, not even about death.

Moreover, love is a questionable feeling, it certainly has nothing to do with what is called ‘engagement’ because I believe that it is impossible to love one and only one person, whether for a moment or always. Also you have to love yourself first before loving someone else, so you always love a minimum of two people.

When I love somebody, I love somebody. Enough. Stop.


But what is it?

Let me explain what I mean through some definitions about what is ‘ENGAGEMENT’:

  • ILLUSORY AGREEMENT OF PROPERTY . Attempt to link and condemn on your side forever the person you ‘love’;
  • FEAR OF SOLITUDE. Desperate for a certainty, to never be alone;
  • DON’T LOVE YOURSELF. Need to define yourself within a ‘official’ relationship;
  • SOURCE OF PRIDE. Attempt to increase self-esteem through the eyes of others;
  • WIFE AND MISTRESS. Security of being loved by someone and being able to have sex with someone else;
  • SOMEONE WHO IS WAITING FOR YOU FOREVER. Need to know that there is someone who is there for you when you go back home from work, college or one of your cheatings;
  • FEELING YOURSELF IMPORTANT FOR SOMEONE. Need to feel important for someone more than for yourself;
  • FEELING USEFUL. Provide for a lack of self-esteem feeling useful for someone else;
  • HYPOCRISY. Hypocritical self-belief that you need only that person;
  • ILLUSION. Delude yourself and the other person to be born to be together forever;
  • PROMOTER OF CONSUMISM. Spending money at Christmas, Valentine’s Day, anniversary, month anniversary, first-film anniversary, first-kiss, first-time anniversary…
  • END OF DIET. End of an endless diet;
  • FICTION. Fake satisfaction and happiness;
  • SEX INSURED. Security of being able to have sex when you want without having to pay anyone or relying on ‘unknown’ or being judged;
  • LOVE INSURED. Receiving always affection, deserved or not;
  • CHEATING INSURED. Voluntary imprisonment of themselves that makes cheating juicy.

And this is ‘LOVE’:

  • A HUG
  • A FILM
  • A SONG

Loving is living.

Loving is not to be engaged.

And being engaged does not mean to love.

And there’s no need to tell you that ‘to live’ is a collective verb.

Love! = Live! = Love yourself and who lives with you!

Fake face for a good impression.

It’s useless that you are there looking at me with that strange behavior. If you have something to say, speak. Basically I do not care what’s on your mind, but even if I don’t like it, life has placed me in a position in which I’ve necessarily to relate with you. So I relate with you. I think. I speak. I don’t just look at you, I don’t just inspect you, I don’t just judge you. I’m not a spectator of your life. I interact with you. I express myself. I express my ideas. And your ideas? You cannot play this game with me. I can read into your mind. I can perceive any symptom of resentment or disagreement through your voice, your eyes or your movements. That’s why I hate all of your fake smiles or condescension. I’d like to have a verbal fight / confrontation with you. But this is impossible. You don’t like to speak about your opinions, to express yourself so much. You prefer a quiet life, you’re for the peace in the world.

Long time ago someone said that if you act like a stupid it’s because you don’t want to take part in the war. Maybe he or she was just talking about you. You don’t convert your thoughts into words. No, you don’t do it because it’s too dangerous and you risk to take part in a war that you don’t like or you would not be able to deal with. A war that is nothing more than a mutual exchange of points of view. And the most detestable side of you, it’s not that you don’t have your own point of view. Indeed. Of course you have it. But you keep it for yourself.

Tell me something.

I’m really curious to know it. I’m dying to know how you feel to be liked by everyone. Is it satisfactory? And is it satisfactory to lock yourself in yourself and show to the world a face of cock that doesn’t bark or bite? Is it satisfactory that no one has never said fuck off to you? I don’t expect you to answer. You won’t do it because it will be against your true nature and your principles. You will just answer some nonsense sentences like “forget it” or “it’s not worth to discuss it” if your courage is on your side, otherwise you will dismiss me with a smile or an emoticon. Yes, emoticons. They are more fashion and famous these times. Who knows maybe you might even stumble across an allusive link on facebook which shows a mentality similar to yours. Then you’ll be happy to share it. It’s not so much risky to expose themselves in this way, no?

Moreover, of course you have a best friend with whom you can vent your most hidden malice, a loyal friend who will not ever object to you. An easy life, is it not? Who knows maybe you disseminate only peace and love also with your dear friend.

After all, why should you risk?

The birth of friendship.

Yes, maybe you don’t know that, but friendship was born in 1871. Young people were sad and lonely before. Loneliness and monotony hovered over the streets of the village, across the windows of the sad country houses, echoing in the empty glasses of beer piled on the counter of a bar. The atmosphere was dark, people were closed in themselves and they did not use to communicate each other, they avoided to see into the eyes of the other people along the way, no one was smiling. Everything was black until 1871 when Mr. X demonstrated the operation of his device that he called “mobileaushudfjsfkj”. Even if the record for having invented the friendship seems to belong to Mr. Y who was able to realize an electrical device capable of communicating at a distance already in the fifties of the nineteenth century. Then in the 1800 and something, a friend of MR X introduced a machine for the electronic transmission of musical sounds by vibrating a finger under the influence of an electromagnetic field.

Unfortunatly this device was not able to transmit voice, but only sounds. So everyone continued to be sad. Everyone lived in despair, wasting away for the inability to communicate with the friend living on the next door. Everything was sad until it was invented by XXY, the handset. It was born when XXY had the idea to tie a microphone and a receiver to a stick, so you can have a free hand to masturbate, and the other at last to communicate. So everyone who was sad to run among the meadows, that was sad to leave empty glasses of beer at the bar of the village, that was forced to confront the reality of every day life, all of these sad people became happy now. Yes, there was nothing more rewarding and happy than frolicking with a handset. Finally, a device that allowed everyone to call their friends and share their dreams and opinions, finally a device that allowed everyone to call their friends and tell them which kind of beers they loved more the week before in the bar of the village, finally a device that allowed people to forward their voice towards other friends. You know that we have on the tongue a microchip installed at the time of birth to enable voice transmission? Without it we could never communicate, that’s why the friendship was born only at the turn of 1800 and 1900 when auxiliary devices were annexed to the incomplete human nature for the improvement of living conditions.

It must be said, however, that friendship was incomplete. The days were less gloomy, hearts and minds were less oppressed… but, deeply something was still missing .. It was the sight! How can friendship exist without the sight? The sight was born in the second half of the twentieth century. When the scientist Doctor G in collaboration with the technologist Lord J elaborated microscopic electromagnetic devices to be applied on the optic nerve which would have allowed the visual feedback of an image transmitted in a monitor. The rampant happiness in having acquired this vital sense led to a immense feeling of friendship and to a passionate love towards own lovely monitor.

There was only one small drawback: the microscopic electromagnetic devices only reproduce images in black and white. Rivers of bicolor friendship had to flow under the bridges before people became able to recognize the color of a lawn, or a beer, or the color of the eyes of a friend. A proportion directly proportional: monitor: monitor = monitor: monitor. A impeccable proportion whose stratospheric result was the real true friendship. Everything was going for the best of ways, everything was going reallyreallygood, friendship here, friendship there, monitor on this side, monitor on the other side … Finally there was no more sad people on the street or at the bar, no lawn sad, no sad soccer ball slamming to the windows.. Nothing of so much sadness, but only happy and smiling friends near their handsets and trustful monitor. A happiness sosososo much big that when MrLordFly X and his brother Y announced, to the new victims of friendship, the great news: “Finally we no longer need to hear and to speak each other” people were more and more happy. Yes, next to the images that used to run on the monitor was applied a system of reciprocal responses and counter-responses, in a fast and mutual alternation of friendly exchanges of friendship, a stratospheric invention that the superEnglishtechnodoctor McFlurry called “Chat”.

I wish a good friendship to everybody.

Soul mate? It’s a bluff!

Women, men, your soul mate doesn’t exist. Or maybe let’s put it on another level…there are so many kindred spirits as are our characteristics, ideas, tastes, trends, opinions.. Do you have only one characteristic? Do you have only one idea? Do you have only one taste? Do you have only one trend? Do you have only one opinion? NO! Then explain to me, stupid women and stupid men, how can you believe that there is just one soul mate for you! Let’s assume that religion had never existed and that nobody had ever said that the man should mate with the woman, or that a woman should mate with the man, or that a man should mate with just one woman, or that a woman should mate with just one man, or that a woman doesn’t have to mate with another woman or a man shouldn’t mate with another man. Let’s assume that the sacrament of marriage had never existed and that nobody had ever said that the woman and the man should find their soul mate with whom spending the rest of their lives. Let’s assume that you had been the first human to populate the earth .. Would you have ever make the scruples that you do now? Would you have ever act and reason as you do now? NO! Because there would have been nobody before you to tell you how to act! You are right to be jealous of your boyfriend or girlfriend because he or she may, every day, meet interesting people like you or more than you, or at least interesting in a different way. Billion people inhabit the earth and maybe, who knows, even the universe … what could force you to be just with one person for the rest of your life? Love is a wonderful feeling, perhaps the first among feelings .. and because it’s the first feeling, it cannot be felt in a unique and one-sided way. The world is full of people waiting to be loved, one or two in the same time, and why not three, four, five, ten, all at once. We can love different people for different reasons. Why should we necessarily choose one and only one person? And it is not about being assholes or not to have heart, on the contrary, it is to have a heart so big to be open to any opportunity. A person can be a part of your life, but he or she will never be your life. Only you are your life and you can be a part of the life of someone else. But you’ll never be his or her life. If you think that all I have said is bullshit and if you believe in the soul mate, it’s only because you are fucking afraid to be alone. Love each other. Love. Everybody.

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